Day 7: “My Wasian Half”

Last night I had a dream that I was dating my celebrity obsession: Eminem and my best friend Kimmie was dating her celebrity obsession: Leonardo DiCaprio.  We were in the Colorado mountains of Detroit and… I kissed Leo.  I cheated on my dream boyfriend with my best friend’s dream boyfriend.  I woke up feeling weirdly guilty.  What the hell kind of friend was I?!  So, this morning, Kimmie asked if I would help her tape an audition.  I said, Of course, Friend!  Whom I would never wrong!  She just needed to perform two pieces, and I thought, Cool.  This will be done in no time.  Of course, in her hardcore Asian ways, she went over both pieces for HOURS- with no break, strict criticism of each take with, “Ugh, that totally sucked” and refused to eat until she was done.  I kept an omnipresent smile on my face through her freakish self-criticism and filmed her so long that I was late to work (and in my line of work, late is almost as bad as showing up naked.)  “I’m so sorry!”  Kimmie said.  “No, I’m fine!  We’re fine!  We’re fine, right?” I said.  Kimmie is by far my closest friend, a sister from another mister you might say (forgive my rhyming, I still can’t get Eminem out of my head), and the only friend where my mega slutdom hasn’t effected our relationship.

I met Kimmie St. Claire 5 years ago when we were both brand new employees at a super fancy day spa outside of DC.  She’s a half Korean, half American beauty (White+Asian = Wasian) and the kind of girl I hated in high school.  You know her type- over achieving, front row center, hands always in the air to answer every question and scoffed at sluts like me.  Man, she was annoying.  Well, her type was.  The 5 star day spa had a strict black & white dress code and when they told me to straighten my crazy curly hair and Kimmie to wear more make up, the following day I walked in with a spaghetti strap tank, hair extra wild and she walked in with converse sneakers and I knew there was enough bad girl in this smarty pants for us to be friends.

Soon afterwards, Kimmie and I were cast in a horror movie  (before I quit acting all together and became a freelance makeup artist) she was the lead and I played the role of “best friend.” We went from on-screen best friends to real life best friends by the time the movie wrapped.  Kimmie today is rising starlet, writer, and producer of Independent films- she has a spitfire temper, a do or die attitude, and in true Asian girl fashion: has a strict application process before putting out her Wasian-Freak-Nasty-Ways.

Kimmie doesn’t have too many friends, not just because she’s doesn’t have a filter, but because she’s so damn self-absorbed, ok, focused is a nicer description.  So self-absorbed, ahem, focused- that potential friends can’t snap her out of her world and men rarely do.  Once you have entered her world, though, she’s proven to be the most loyal friend (just like in the Taurus zodiac descriptions)  I’ve tried to take a page out of Kimmie’s book in the years we’ve been friends:  roll my eyes at good-looking guys that try to talk to me at bars, honest, focus on my work, and zoom ahead in life with such ferocity that only the worthy men and friends can break get through.  (Not that Kimmie hasn’t dated some losers- hell, some guys can get past anyone’s radar.)

As much as Kimmie has been through with me and my never-ending drama with men.  I was convinced that she had no idea what a mega-slut I am.

“Everyone knows,” Kimmie said to me.

“Well, no.  Maybe you do- I mean, we’re such good friends-”

“No.”  Kimmie cuts me off, rolling her eyes like she does when people don’t understand her right away.  “Everybody knows.”

I guess announcing a different boyfriend every few weeks kind of gave away that my behavior wasn’t exactly chaste…

“Who’s everybo-”

“Everybody.  Everybody.  It’s OK, nobody knew you even were trying to hide it.”

There are many reasons why Kimmie is my best friend, but the heart of it came when she revealed to me how transparent of a slut I am.  I was so worried about her judging me and she said, “Veronica, if you were happy sleeping with half of DC, then I’m happy for you… But you’re not… Being a slut isn’t a problem, it’s the way that it makes you feel that’s the problem.”

Somehow as I’ve pushed nearly everyone away in my life by my behavior, Kimmie has been the one friend that it has yet to effect.  I wish I could say it’s because I’ve always been on my best behavior around her, but she’s been around for the Top 10 Veronica Shameless & Bitchiest Moments.  I try to interpret my dream, thinking, maybe I’ll push Kimmie away one day like most of my other friends…  But I do believe, for my best friend, if Leo and I were driving up the Rocky Mountain to get to Eminem’s house on the top, I wouldn’t sneak him a kiss…  And I can’t say that would be true if this were 5 years ago when we first met.

Here’s to 359 Days, Veronica Graham, to keeping friends-not losing them-

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