Day 150-160: “11 Days and 11 BIG, BIG Lies”

“The Pathological Liar”  He takes the cake and he was worse than RMM. I think that if there was a chance to be in a relationshit with him it would have been worse than Iago. He stopped at nothing to convince me that he was worthy of my heart.  This whatever-you-call-it-relationshit-two-week-love-affair officially ended yesterday on the 28th of September over a text conversation.  Sure, there were some red flags….  First off:

1. This guy is 27, a little young.

2. He was a descendent Alexander the great

3. Smoked a blunt with Snoop Dog in his house- Snoop Dog’s house, not his… he lives out of his car.

4. Was the nephew of the Xerox inventor, you know, Chester Carlson who invented xerox in 1937 and died in 1968.

5. He was a psychic and was going to get in trouble with the spirit world for telling me my future

6. He once was a famous musician who worked really hard to get his name off of the internet ENTIRELY

7. He hung out with Kayne West and Akon

8. He worked at Stanford University

9. He started and sold a prominent clothing line based in CA

10. He went to some a foreign international school based in Texas that doesn’t exist

11. He is a cyclist and rode with Lance Armstrong

As prominent as this guy was, I bought every meal we shared together and 16 pairs of socks for him.  He was living out of his car and moving to New York to become a millionaire.  HE WAS SUCH A LOSER.  He was a dildo…. and I fucked myself.  Yes, I believed all of this.  ALL OF IT.  I still have mascara stains on my pillow for the heartbreak I feel from our breakup.

Obviously, all of these things were complete lies and somehow, it took me until after I was away from him for a few days to realize this.  On Friday, I left him (after buying 16 pairs of socks… and cologne for him) and didn’t hear him for days… I slowly started to question some things he told me, like… how could a 27 year old be the nephew of the Xerox inventor who invented Xerox in 1937.  HOW did he get his “super famous name” off the internet?  How easy it was for Pathological Liar to lie to me is as easy as it is to lie to myself… We had a connection that even fire responds to- I know this because of a camping trip I took with him.

The camping trip proved to me that he was the one for me and everything he was telling me MUST be true.  The stars aligned and we went camping together, dancing naked, drinking wine, having SEX in a tent, next to a huge fire (that I had to make… because he didn’t know how…  I guess the being the descendent of Alexander the Great doesn’t mean you went to boy scouts)  We were like one souls, animals- licking each other- yes, we did… and it was hot.  BUT…. I went back home to DC away from the woods and woke from my dream.

I didn’t question his lies and just like all guys who finally get a piece of ass from some girl he barely knows… he didn’t call the next day… or the next few days.  He finally sends a text message asking when I would invite him over.  I had been crying for days for being such an idiot.  I wanted to tell him, “COME OVER!  I’ll make you dinner, feed you lots of expensive wine, hear your stories…” but for once, I had enough pride in me and thanks to the support of a few good friends and kismet strangers (Thanks Gerard Butler, Mr. Red Tie, and the Daring Duo) to tell him ,”No, I will not be inviting you over.”  I also explained that he did not call me and I was not that type of girl… at least I was deciding not to be at that moment.. And God willing, from now on.

I KNOW how full of shit this sounds.  I get it.  First the vow, then Mr. Nice, and now this Pathological Liar.  I get it.  I suck at keeping promises to myself.  But I’ve been avoiding writing this entry because I didn’t want to admit this.  It hurts to get nasty comments about how much I suck and honestly, they’re not saying anything I’m not already thinking.  I haven’t been able to get past Pathological Liar in the last few days and I hope with the continued support of the few good friends I have, I can actually keep my legs shut.  I got too comfortable and way too arrogant with my vow, was proven wrong, and trust me, I’m paying for it.  More than I can express on my laptop.  NO, NO, I don’t have an STD or with child (at least it was SAFE sex!) but I’m hurting pretty bad right now.

I recognize that if I can fall for THIS LOSER, damn… I need to figure out what the hell is going on with me to make my wires cross to slut every time.  I NEED to take the time to get to know myself before getting to know a man… and yes, this is easier said than done (especially for me) so I hope that the good people in my life can continue to be there for me and help me make it through this.

Here’s to what could have been to 216-206 Days, Veronica Graham- THIS is why people Google after a first date, really?! Xerox? 1937?! Come on!

2 Responses to “Day 150-160: “11 Days and 11 BIG, BIG Lies””

  1. I read your blog. I kinda know how you feel, cause it sees Ike we were almost dating the exact same person (although mine was a woman)
    If you ever want to chat, I’m a normal, regular guy. Nothing too plain and nothing too extraordinary. You seem like you have a good head on your shoulders.

  2. Darknight Says:

    1. I am young. True. 25 on paper, 27 in reality. You can thank the courts for that when I changed my name.
    2. I am descended from Alexander the Great. http://www.nature.com/embor/journal/v9/n2/full/7401164.html
    Pathan (Pashtun)
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pashto

    The oral tradition of the Pashtun have some interesting traditions. One states that they are the descendants of Alexander’s army(foundation of Khandahar), and the other states that they are a lost tribe of Israel that was banished by the Assyrians. One specific tribal name is Yusufzai,( son of Joseph).

    Genetic study results: WINNER!! Small admixture of haplotype E3b1, which is heavily concentrated in the Balkans, Macedonia and Bulgaria in particular.

    Genetic Study:
    More recently, Tyler-Smith has been checking claims that Pathan tribesmen from Pakistan descended from Alexander the Great’s army, as claimed in oral traditions. The results of this work, published in 2007 in the European Journal of Human Genetics, seem to support the oral tradition as they describe two Pathans with E3b1 lineages, which are otherwise specifically associated with Macedonia and Greece (Firasat et al, 2007).
    http://www.nature.com/embor/journal/v9/n2/full/7401164.html
    3. He lives inside the “Country Estates” Gated Community: 2399 Alamo Heights Dr Diamond Bar, CA 91765. My uncle, who suffered from chronic pain due to a pinched psiatic nerve had a medical marijuana prescription and the two of them used to smoke together. I came over to his house with my uncle, and while his two boys Corde and Cordell (both cute little babies at the time) were away, he asked me if I’d ever smoked, I replied “no, I’ve only watched,” and then he let me take a few puffs and I preceded to cough and choke violently as my uncle and him laughed. Not that glamorous.
    4. & 8. You’re definitely misquoting me. I stated that my uncle, same one who lives in the gated community, ‘helped the founders,’ not ‘was the founder’ of the original Xerox. The modern Xerox company didn’t come into it’s own until it became an IPO in the late 1960’s, and only after Charles Peter McColough opened the Xerox PARC (Xerox Palo Alto Research Center) research facility which developed most of the modern computing technologies such as the mouse and the graphical user interface (GUI: Ability to use a mouse to click on programs rather than type prompts).

    As a side note, you should note that Palo Alto is where STANFORD is based, I got a job here as a result of my connections with my uncle (PARC was run almost entirely by Stanford Students and faculty) who recommended that his very nerdy nephew (I was and am a mega-nerd) take on a job teaching sales, marketing, and oral rhetoric to several small startups in the technology corridor in the late 1990’s before the first IT bubble burst. Anyone who lived in this area will tell you that people were so desperate for help with how to make a software company profitable that people were hired for all kinds of strange gigs. Mine lasted 4months, I got paid well, got to teach graduates how to ‘sell their ideas’ to fund-raisers and teach them enough inter-personal skills to attract a sales force, a team of computer-software engineers, and hopefully angel investors who would guide them to an IPO public offering on the NASDAQ within a 36-month window. I also taught kickball to children with Multiple Sclerosis for free. I guess that makes me a terrible person for not clarifying that you somehow may have misconstrued ‘teaching’ with being a tenured-professor. I prefer it when people ask questions to clarify rather than jump to conclusions.

    Xerox went on to make one of the first personal computers and soon after became a household name due to their success in influencing the office work culture. My uncle was part of the original innovators in the late 1960 to the mid 1980’s where he went on to make innovative print solutions and creating several profitable patents for Xerox. When he left the company and the board, he walked away with a sizable sum of valuable publicly traded shares, and he went on to become the founder of a digital copying/multimedia web-based enterprise, selling and franchising the idea to several other dot.com startups as well as creating his own empire.

    Here’s a pubic article on his innovations at Xerox and the good work he’s done overseas:
    http://outputlinks.com/html/people/Entrepreneurial_Spirit_Basit_Hamid_WYSIWYG_Visionary_and_Elixir_Technologies_Founder_112205111000-639290214.aspx

    One of his company websites:http://www.elixir.com/
    Profile: http://www.elixir.com/Corporate-Overview.html
    5. There’ nothing wrong with using more of the human brain than other’s typically use. Some may profess the ability and are simply charlatans, others prefer to harness and refine their natural senses, intuitions, instincts, and perceptions to allow for the unseen to be seen or felt before something occurs. I am a very spiritual person, and I do believe that telling people my own intuitions can typically lead to more harm than good, since someone may be inclined to so heavily believe what I tell them that they create that into their reality. It’s not a good thing as I explained to you that I never believe in being manipulative of other people’s own free will. Everyone is entitled to live out their life. I’m a heavy believer in science, but nothing in science has disproven the ability of some people to have another ‘sense’ of what is to come for either themselves or others. Try reading a few books such as “Intuition” by Osho, a world-renowned spiritual leader, and “He has been described by the Sunday Times of London as one of the “1000 Makers of the 20th Century” and by Sunday Mid-Day (India) as one of the ten people-along with Gandhi, Nehru, and Buddha-who have changed the destiny of India. More than a decade after his death in 1990, the influence of his teachings continues to expand, reaching seekers of all ages in virtually every country of the world.” Here’s some link for you to check out: http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/intuition-osho/1100941909?ean=9780312275679&itm=2&usri=intuition
    I would also recommend you read this book: The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science (http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/brain-that-changes-itself-norman-doidge/1100994808?ean=9780143113102&itm=1&usri=how%2bthe%2bbrain%2bchanges%2bitself)
    6. & 7. I never claimed to have been a famous musician, some people thought I was famous, I was just a local fixture during the SXSW festivals in Austin, which happens to have several million people in attendance. My brother, myself, and Julian, all worked as independent contractors for Radio One (http://www.radio-one.com/about/) during the festival and we were allowed to sign and work closely with several musicians, including high profile ones such as Akon, Kanye West, Bun-B, B.O.B, Big-Tuck, Paul Wall, Travis McCoy, Shot Theory, Ment Nelson, Oxymoron, Fizzy Dino-Pop (signed personally), Sore Losers (signed personally), and probably a dozen more artists/bands. This is a festival where people come to get discovered and we were the gate-keepers to most of these peoples’ dreams. My own personal music ambitions were useless, I stated that pretty clearly, and not wanting your name and contact information on the internet is a sensible business stance given that anyone who thinks their music is halfway decent would harass me to sample it, meet, or discuss contracts. It’s pure torture to listen to bad music, and worse to crush someone else’s dreams. The worst part is being associated with a bunch of drugged out musicians who only want to ‘hang out’ rather than do their job which is to produce marketable music that sounds good. I left the industry and erased as much of my online information as possible because I felt it was a bad influence on myself and my siblings who were in constant contact with some unsavory musicians and their drug-addled lifestyle. Forgive me for not wanting to develop a bad cocaine or heroin habit in front of my highly naïve younger brothers.
    9. It was called ‘The Royale-Clothier Company. If you use facebook you can login and see some of the older publications, clothing designs, and publicity photos with the musicians who wore our popular designs. I never liked being in photos since I did most of the marketing and publications for the sales and I would personally be the one behind the camera most of the time. However, you can look at many pictures with my brother doing all the campaigning with famous musicians wearing our stuff, and if you’re compelled I can send you photos of me with just about any famous artist that has performed in Austin’s SXSW. To clarify, we had a base in Berkeley, California and in Austin, Texas as well as a call center office in Dallas, Texas; sold clothing across the country and through special order on the now-defunct website. In total, we had 60 different assorted t-shirts, several hoodies, and a few other merchandise. The other clothing line that never took off but was associated was ‘Rolling-8’s Jeans’ but Levi’s didn’t want to lower production cost in their China plant, so it was never a profitable company.

    Here’s the fanpage for one of the companies:

    http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Royal-Clothier-Company/209151330306

    10. Yes. It does exist actually. It’s called the Greenhill School. It was the first of it’s kind in Dallas, Texas and it’s considered one of the most prestigious and exclusive private schools in the country. I went here on an academic scholarship since it costs about $28k per year, not including the separate boarding which is usually not talked about on the website since it’s only open to international students and they don’t want it to be public knowledge where a diplomat’s child or some CEO’s kids are staying. I’m not being a snob, that’s just what this place is. Feel free to explore the website. When you have children, consider sending them here or to a school like this, it will help them to a life of prosperity and happiness from the well rounded education:
    http://www.greenhill.org/podium/default.aspx?t=126544
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Greenhill_School_(Addison,_Texas)
    11. I am a cyclist. And I did in fact ride with Lance Armstrong on several occasions. Seeing that I spent some of my prime years as a prominent cyclist in Richardson (right by Greenhill School) and rode for the same team as Lance Armstrong (http://bikemart.com/articles/history-pg43.htm) you can see that he was racing for them at a local level since 1987 and continued to do so through 2005. He returned to Dallas after his post Tour-de-France periods to visit his mother and ride with the locals every fall who groomed him into a powerful rider. I’ve got enough evidence to back this claim up including gifts from him, personally autographed books, photos, and easily hundreds of people from the team who saw us riding together when I was growing up. It’s no secret. It’s also well known that I trained with ‘Matrix Racing’ team in both Richardson and Boulder, Colorado and later with ‘Java Joes’ and later ‘Caisse d’Epargne’ in Girona, Spain. I also appeared on the cover of ‘Rocky Mountain Cyclist’ 3years ago at the finish line of the Sunrise Challenge where I’m prominently smiling while leading a break-away. I had a great career and was cut down from my best goals when I was hit by a reckless driver of a F-150 truck which is why I have those awful scars on my arms and legs and why I kept some facial hair to cover the more visible scars.

    It’s not surprising that those who suffer from different levels of borderline personality can idealize, fragment, and misconstrue the facts and realities that surround them in order to justify either demonizing someone or glorifying them, and switching between the two rapidly and without logic, but rather driven by emotional insecurities or a self-destructive view of intrapersonal-relationships as something to be manipulated rather than allow to develop naturally. I’m pretty sure your friend, whom I met upon your suggestion, will agree that I’m not some scrub. If you claim that she ‘liked me’ as a person when she has rarely liked others you have introduced to her, could it simply be that the other guys were actually full of shit, and that for once you might have met someone who was actually living their life to their full potential rather than sitting on their asses all day doing nothing with their time and ambitions.

    As a rebuttal: Getting your professional name off the internet is actually fairly easy (thank god only a handful of people know my full real name). At the time, I had several creepy musician stalkers who I turned down their works at SXSW and after a few restraining orders they proceeded to harass me through the web and sent me obscene emails. I contacted the site administrators of several websites and sent them a court mandated “Cease & Desist” for publishing my legal and professional name in anything online or to list my contact information. I sent this out to all the main search engines as well as RSS blog list feeds a few years ago as well as deleting all my social networking account and having them purged from server farms in Dalles, Oregon where Google.com maintains private account information for its users and search engines. This was routine and possible in order to protect the identities of non-public officials and private citizens from intrusions of privacy against stalkers and criminals under FCC’s freedom of information and securities ruling in 2002 which was overturned in late 2009 due to facebook’s preeminence and separate global servers being in non-consenting countries that did not agree on these legal tactics as a means to protect citizens since it involved breaking international law & commerce rulings.

    I can make a fire given appropriate materials. Wet wood, a small lighter, and no kindling material is not an easy fix. And, actually the gentleman from southern Virginia who came by with Citronella fluid actually made the fire and he failed once and claimed “this fire ain’t taking very well, this wood is too damned wet,” and then only after nearly ½ gallon of fluid did the fire start. It has nothing to do with being a boy scout. Boy scouts are prepared when they plan on doing something; the fire was a spontaneous addition to an otherwise magical night.

    I made it pretty clear that I was going to be busy sorting out my move from DC to NYC and even then I sent you several text messages over the following days and if you check your phone you should have atleast 1-2missed calls from when you were at work and either 1)turned off your phone 2)had it on silent. I did text you to ask if you wanted to hang out, but you were “drinking with film buddies” so I left it at that and wished you the best for the evening.

    I asked when you were inviting me over because the night we went camping you said that you’d love to cook for me and have me over when your relatives weren’t around. Then you sent me a text message a few days later telling me just that, that your relatives would be gone for 4days. Then I guess I poorly assumed that you’d contact me with more information as to what you had planned. Sending you a text for “When are you going to invite me over?” does not automatically equate to sex given that several of your interactions were just for hanging out and getting to know each other, and frankly, I’m offended that you just lump me into some category of guys who don’t give a shit about others. If you could step into my shoes and see that I was busy for 4days of sub-letting a 3-story duplex in Arlington, helping my brother, selling most of my belongings, applying for a new job in NYC, and finding a place in NYC; all the while planning to move while somehow generating enough cash to hold me over for a year, well, you’d be pretty busy too.

    Being frugal and bohemian for a few days given my circumstances is hardly ‘living out of my car’ since I was staying at an executive long stay hostel in DC for 10days while I was transitioning to NYC, not exactly a cheap place either.

    To clarify, I specifically said “I don’t need you to buy me ANYTHING,” to which you responded “I WANT to buy you” and you bought me some socks. And you offered to pay for a meal. For someone who is a striking and living feminist, I find it odd that you’d hold it against me since I offered to pay for all of my own stuff. I did in fact buy a $140 Fossil watch right in front of you, and I have to say thanks once again, since it’s gotten me a lot of compliments already. It’s hardly worth mentioning that I shared a few bottles of damned expensive wine that I brought back with me from Spain, since I’m not petty, I didn’t bother explaining how much they cost when you asked me but rather replied “my friend’s work at a winery.” True, but, they are still $80 bottles. I figured enjoying good wine while camping was necessary since you mentioned to me you enjoy quality alcohol.

    On a side note. I am not a pathological liar. You may want to review, ‘be lying to myself’ in your own writings. I am not desperate for ‘sex’, I can write my exploits here, but that’s just too damned cruel and indecent given that I’ve likely been just as promiscuous as you in the past, present, and future. I’m not a player since I’ve never had trouble ‘keeping’ lovers. I never saw the point of a trail of broken hearts, better to be up front and honest about what each person wants in any relationship and allow it to progress or end naturally.

    If you want to find me and apologize for slandering me and other libel statements, it’s public knowledge where I live. I live in NYC in the Upper East Side, 85th and 3rd Avenue. It’s a nice place, and you’ll recognize my old car, it’s parked between the 2011 Audi S5 ‘jet black’ and the 2010 Roll-Royce Ghost which is ‘charcoal grey’ and I think sometimes my neighbor parks a ‘bright-red’ AMG Mercedes Coupe right in front of the doorway. I’m not stating all this to sound like a pompous and arrogant twat, simply to make location easy for you, and you should know I do not care about materialistic things. You may have secretly laughed or cried about who you thought I am/was/ or whatever; reality is that I live around people with certain qualities, you can find me amongst them and I’ll still be wearing my tattered jeans, sandals, a white v-neck and probably my straw hat while everyone else will be wearing whatever they bought at the Barney’s on the same street I live on. I’ll wear my watch so I don’t look ‘poor’ or too ‘bohemian’ for your standards. I’m glad I never told you any of my real financials or acted like the ‘rich assholes’ you dated earlier. My private and work lives are just that, private, and I didn’t know you well enough to disclose to you every little detail.

    I wrote this reply because I cared and I was offended that my impression on you was not positive but hurtful to you. I don’t need any negative kharma in my life.
    As always, best wishes.
    -The Darknight

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