Day 170: “Fate or Probability?”

Once upon a time, three guys walked into a bar and ordered a beer.  The three guys shortly realized that they’ve all slept with Veronica Graham.  Fate or Probability?  Hard to say since I’ve fucked Washington D.C.


The three guys all walked into an Irish bar (yes, different from the one that I work in today) to have a beer to wind down from a day at work.  I was dating Iago at the time, and therefore, out of the social scene.  The guys started talking, I’m not sure for how long before it turned into the conversation about “crazy girls” they’ve dated or fucked.

For one of the guys, Brandon, I happened to be at the top of his list.  Brandon and I dated briefly while we worked together at one of the many restaurants I’ve worked in and he left me for a younger girl, she was 19 at the time, not even old enough to join him at a bar!  I was PISSED, FURIOUS!  We still worked together and I couldn’t help but say things like, “WHAT?!! Is it because she’s YOUNGER than me?!,”  “Does she FUCK better than me?!,” “Her EARS are HUGE!”  This officially put me in the crazy category, especially when I was trying to smell the difference between a Coca-Cola and Diet Coke for a table I was serving.  He had said to me, “What, you can’t tell the difference with that nose?!”  I threw a lime wedge at him and told him to go fuck himself… Maybe THAT was the incident I was finally put in the crazy category.  Just a note:  I was on a lot of drugs during this point in my life.  He also went on to talk about my crazy boyfriend, Iago, that followed me home one day and ended up having the cops called on him for Criminal Stalking.

This reminded Breton of a girl he was once with.  Same level of emotion instability, but did have a crazy guy that used to follow her around everywhere.  Of course, this guy was Iago.  While I was sleeping with Breton, Iago used to follow me a lot… when I left home from work, when I left work to go home, and when I left home to go to Breton’s apartment for sex.  One time I notice Iago’s car circling Breton’s apartment and FREAKED out, we were low crawling underneath one of the windows before dialing 911 to finally get the cops to catch him!  Yes, I did leave Breton for Iago, sadly as I mentioned in yesterday’s post.  However, the crazy stories didn’t stop there.

The third guy worked with Brandon and mentioned the times I would corner him during work asking when we would make out!  I used to talk to him about how beautiful his eyes were and how badly I wanted to make out with him… apparently, girls as aggressive and crazy as I am aren’t so easy to find.  Then…. my name came up and the three of them all connected the dots that they had slept with and was talking about the same girl.  Yes…. THIS girl.  Veronica Graham.

The three guys then left the bar to go play beer pong at Brandon’s place and apparently hung out on multiple occasions together… I don’t know about you, but that’s fucking weird.  Crazy guys.

Here’s to what could have been 196 days, Veronica Graham, Ah, Fuck it…

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