Day 207: 7 Examples of Why “Scruff” Trumps “Baby Face”

November… also known as Movember is the month dedicated to raising awareness for prostate cancer and other cancers that affect men. Each year male participants from all over the world start with a clean shave on November 1st and maintain their favorite style mustache until the 30th. It’s been quite a sight to see every time I enter the Irish bar…The entire male staff agreed to participate this year and it’s getting pretty hairy. Some of the guys look pretty damn hot while others look like 70’s rejects. These guys are going over the top this Movember sporting the all too familiar porn star stache, fu manchu, trucker, and the chaplin.

Personally, I find men with facial hair sexy. The clean cut look is fine and dandy, but the sex appeal of a man that can pull of a mustache is off the charts. The following is a list of the Top 7 who look better in their natural hairiness versus the Catholic school boy look.

7: James Franco. 

Mr. Franco here is the perfect example of why a little scruff adds a some “umph” to a man.  Sure, he still looks good and all in his baby bum face, but he also looks like he’d be a great looking French model with a long wig on.  The scruff makes you want to scratch your face against his as you’re making out. Making out with a real man should always leave you feeling a little tender to the touch.

6:  Bradley Cooper.

Oh Brad…without the scruff he seems like a smug Massachusetts asshole. The scruff humbles him and portrays the image of the type of guy that will take you to dinner, open every door and kiss you goodnight.

5:  Colin Farrell.

He has that boyish Homecoming King look. You know the type … not too smart and has more than likely failed math twice but is so damn cute that he gets away with it. In his scruff he seems cultured, worldly and ready to party. The best two things to come out of Ireland…Guinness and you!

4:  Anthony Keidis.

He looks more like a hipster who’s too worried about being nonconventional. He would never be caught dead in a Starbucks because of his “ideals” that he probably picked up watching a documentary. The scruff embraces his manliness. He wouldn’t give a shit if he was seen in a Starbucks because he owns a Harley and just finished having sex on the side of the highway.

3: Scott Weiland.

He looks like those guys who get confused between goth culture and vampire culture. Please don’t suck my blood…Mrs…er….? When he’s scruffy, all I can think about is catching the first flight to Transylvania to have sex in a castle hidden deep in the woods. Sure… you can bite me anywhere.

2: Joseph Gordon-Levitt.

The Frat boy look has it’s perks but his scruff takes bad ass to another realm. Please invade my dreams…

1. Johnny Depp

Johnny fucking Depp. Those warm brown are tantalizing and his lips look like they have been kissed with morning dew… the classic pretty boy. However, in his scruff I want to toss his hat to the floor, mess up his picture perfect hair and talk dirty over a glass of Macallan 55 year old scotch. Damn Johnny, how does it feel to be you?!

Now that I’m all hot and bothered I can’t help but wonder why more guys don’t keep facial hair?! I guess I’ll have to be content staring at the lads in the Irish bar and Celebrity photographs.

Here’s to what could have been 158 Days, Veronica Graham, Cheers to the month of Movember! Got Scruff?

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