I ain’t no Bible beater!

Are readers still going to find my blog interesting? I’m talking more about being a mom and the almighty Hey-Zeus, that’s interesting, right?  I’m back and in the middle of the classic journey of a ho turnin’ to Hey-Zeus. It’s so funny to me. It really is. How does a dirty little bitty go from writing about straddling…. To talking about parenting and the Bible? Not really sure, it’s so like me though. I feel like a rubber band trying to snap back and be relevant and relatable, we shall see.

I just finished reading a moms post who just started a blog and is begging for readers. ‘It would be so awesome to have some visitors!’ Seriously, come on. You can’t make people read shit about your life, no one fucking cares, it’s hard enough to keep a friend let alone someone interested in your perspective. What are your motives? Are you worried about stats? Hoping to go viral? We all are bitch, we all are.

During the peak of my writing, I stopped. Why? Because someone strongly suggested that my journey was over once the year was up. I agreed, being the good little friend I thought I was supposed to be and tried to help this friend produce her “genius script” into a film. I was convinced I owed her. I gave all I could, literally, had a couple of mental lapses during pre-production and paid the price for going against my gut. It was never going to work because the lack of funding was a huge issue, but we tried and man did this betch have the best manipulation tactics I’ve ever been privy to be tangled in. Guess who the friend was? And guess who she got to fund the film after our go at it failed, SOMEONE ELSE. Poor soul probably has no money now, ah well, that’s what happens when you get fucked by a black widow. Literally and Figuratively.

I write. Why? Because it fucking calms the brain, and being Veronica Graham is awesome. She doesn’t let shit keep her down, she keeps on trying, she is a fighter-slayer of fakeness. I still remember how wide eye Kimmie got when she saw how much people liked my ridiculousness. Her idea to exploit my shit online gained a lot more attention than that star-crazed little betch wanted. Looking back on our friendship is like looking back on a relationship without sex. I was like her little dog, and she was able to hide behind my weaknesses, outbursts, and cash in on the benefits of being the “good one”.

Come to think of it,  February 14, 2013, was the day I moved out of the apartment we shared with that other chick. Oh, how sweet betrayal is from a Taurus! If you’re a Taurus don’t read my blog. They’re the most beautiful soul-sucking humans I’ve ever met. Sure, there might be one or two that are ok, but their smooth exterior and humble disposition is a load of fucking shit. They want two things, fame, and all your money. If a Taurus is in your life go and check how much money you had before you met them, it’s safe to say that they found a way to insert themselves into your life so that you feel you owe the beautiful disaster your Benjamins’

I wiped the snot-nosed tears away from my face about SG’s expectancy and started doing crunches. My options were limited it was either get back in shape and finish reading the Bible or shave my head and get fat. I’ve been letting my glorious hair grow out from a hideous mom bob I got from a scissor happy stylist in the South.  I’m now in the book of Ecclesiastes. Surprisingly, Ecclesiastes is more my style. The first paragraph of the NIV Version, ‘Everything is Meaningless’ -very dark and fatalistic, love it.

Ironically, Kimmie and Southern Gentleman gave me the two greatest gifts… A bible and a baby- and then walked away. HA! How sweet the gift of the betrayers turned out to be! Naturally, I am still angry with both of them- I am a Scorpio. Kimmie never showed up at a lawyers office for our business dispute that happened on October 22, 2012 -Her no-show spoke volumes about how much respect she had for me.  She had about as much respect for me as people who don’t pick up their dogs shit in a beautiful park.

As for my sweet Southern Gentleman, his choice to start a family with a bumpkin from Alabama and neglect his responsibilities to his firstborn still baffles me. 

Aww, Fuck it.

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